10 Original Social Captions

Since words don’t fit into stockings, we’re giving you 10 original social media captions you can use for the holidays!

1. Social media really ruined Festivus by giving people the ability to air their grievances all year long. What a bummer. Oh, well. Happy OTHER holidays, people. 😐

2. Please … just stop. Die Hard IS a Christmas movie, people! There are decorations and everything. Get some holiday spirit for goodness’ sake. 🎄

3. Die Hard is NOT a Christmas movie, people! Seriously. Christmas doesn’t usually EXPLODE. Unless you count family drama. Family drama sometimes explodes. Still doesn’t make Die Hard a Christmas movie, though. 💥

4. Santa knows when you’ve been sleeping, and he knows when you’re awake. He can find out if you’ve been bad or good. He puts you on lists. My gosh, he sounds like Facebook. 🤔

5. Holiday savings tip: If you run out of holiday wrapping paper, use Happy Birthday paper instead, and just add a comma and the word, “Santa.” Everyone will laugh and say how clever you are. You’ll be laughing for a different reason, though. 💰💰💰

6. It just dawned on me that I am that weird relative everyone whispers about in my family. I realized this after I got up from the table to get some water, got distracted by the dog, forgot what I was doing, retraced my steps, and wound up back at the table 20 minutes later with a toy hammer, an armrest cover, and two Christmas tree ornaments. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

7. Oh, deer. Yule never believe what I did to my elf. I was pretending to make it rein, when I slipped on some Santa-tizer and stubbed two of my mistletoes. Now, I’m in tree-mendous pain and feeling a little Santa-mental. Don’t laugh! Be Claus it’s snow joke. 🤦

8. So, wait. The Grinch constantly complains about noise, tells lies to little kids, doesn’t understand people at all, and is just generally disagreeable. Was Dr. Seuss secretly writing about my dad? 🤬

9. Maybe I’m just weird, but when some random person asks me what my New Years’ resolution is, I get totally offended. I mean, seriously. What are you implying? That I need to work on myself? Dude. I barely know you. 😤

10. If you’re looking for some New Years’ resolutions, but don’t really want to put in any effort, try these: 1) Resolve to “get outside more.” 2) Resolve to work more sarcasm into everyday conversations. 3) Resolve to start finding more joy in “the little things.” 🥳